Ivy talks about SABLE, “Stash Amassed Beyond Life Expectancy,” where you have ended up with more yarn than you can knit up in the rest of your life.
My Patient Husband has been moving things around in the house to prepare for Kiddo#4 to arrive eventually. Me, I really don’t want to prepare, but he and the midwife seem to think that being 37 weeks pregnant creates at least some moderate urgency about the whole thing and that we should.
The crib is going to be in the place where we currently have our cedar chest and my yarn stash, so the yarn stash needed to be moved. Thinking to buy some time, I said, “Why don’t I just knit it up?” and my Patient Husband replied, “Because that will take 25 years.”
The whole household is sick right now, by the way, so after that I did today’s prayers and took a nap, and when I woke up, I had a picture in my head of the perfect container to store my yarn stash. I waddled downstairs, found the container, and brought it up to transfer all the yarn out of various bags into the new one.
Lo and behold, my entire yarn stash — including all my needles and other sundries but NOT including my one lone UFO — fits into the plastic zip case in which my son’s twin-size comforter came.
That’s not 25 years worth of yarn! I mean, I’m slow, but someone who knows what she’s doing would be able to knit that up in six months.
I’ve been horribly maligned, I tell you. I am a wounded lamb. 🙁
Of course, now I’m playing with some of the yarn and doing little swatches and enjoying yarn I haven’t touched for a while, which is no good because I still haven’t finished the beaded hat (nor the scarf that will match it) but that’s okay. I’m pretty much a monogamous knitter and will quit flirting with the merino before too much longer.
Next step: set up the room I intend to give birth in. Tomorrow I’m bringing home a birth pool, and I’m going to be moving my pictures of Condor Joe and Vegeta into the room as well. Both to frighten the midwife and to introduce Kiddo#4 to my geekiness right off the bat.
Besides, wouldn’t Vegeta be a terrific labor coach?
No fair. You didn’t link to your story where Vegeta was Bulma’s birth coach. 🙁
Yarn that fits in one bag. Yeah, those were the days. No, that’s not a 25 year supply. Not even close. But getting it knit up before you give birth…not too likely.
Oh, man, I totally forgot I’d written that story! It’s just so…whiney. He wasn’t just her labor coach: he ended up delivering Trunks.
“Bulma needs you in the labor tub,” he said in a low, unemotional voice.
Three nurses sat behind the desk, two with cups of coffee, one looking at a stack of forms. “We’ll be there in five minutes.”
“In that case,” and remembering it now, Vegeta was surprised he’d kept himself collected enough to be sarcastic, “can you tell me how to deliver a placenta?”
I probably can’t knit it all up in three weeks, but still… Oh, I did a swatch of the merino on size twos, and it’s SO sweet. I’m itchy to start some socks with it.
It isn’t whiny, it’s brilliant! I love your Vegeta stories.
See? I told you the yarn love would come.
Vegeta stories? Where? Where?
Cricket, would it make a difference if I told you that they’re not very good?
Cricket, she’d be lying. They’re great.
http://adimra.100megs6.com/fanfiction/oneshots/laundry.html
and
http://adimra.100megs6.com/fanfiction/oneshots/thingshecando.html
and
http://adimra.100megs6.com/fanfiction/oneshots/flashfrozenheart.html
But I can’t find the Trunks birth story. C’mon Jane, post it. It’s good!
Are you on Ravelry?
About stash: I share a house. The only space I have of mine is my bedroom. So, between the closet and the wall, I have 4 plastic boxes, 3 filled with yarn and one with spinning fibre. Plus a plastic box with kitchen utensils mixed with some yarn, plus 2 or 3 bags with works in progress, plus one box with my afghans in progress and their yarn. So, I am avoiding any stash enhancement… except for sock yarn, of which I bought a couple of balls last 2 months.