Refinancing

Remember how horrible our move was? I don’t even want to go back and look for the links to everything that went wrong when we were trying to move from Angeltown to Angelborough. It makes me sick inside. We moved in July and were still cleaning up the transactional messes in October, and last week I even found one more problem that no one had caught onto.

Yep, the move was cursed.

So naturally, I balked at refinancing. It was only when my Patient Husband pointed out that interest rates had dropped 1.5% that I agreed to doing it all over again. We’d be saving a skillion dollars a year, roughly.

First problem (because you knew there would be, right? Moving is a hairy-hairy, after all, and so is refinancing): our mortgage company would not call us back. They said they’d be delighted to refinance us, but after six or seven non-returned or non-answered phone calls, they’d lost our business.

We went with someone else, who was delighted to have us. Sounds good.

I’ll just skip to the end, then, and bring us to the morning of the refinance when I went to the bank to get a check for the closing costs. 

The teller put the check into the printer, and it printed sideways.

I couldn’t help it: I just started to laugh. It’s like the final insult in all these cursed dealings, that the money would be there and the bank willing to give it to us, and the check wouldn’t print. 

The teller reassured me it was fine and reprinted it. And again, it printed crooked. This time the teller said she’d waive the processing fee, and I asked her please not to because if she did, I’d feel guilty writing about it on my weblog.

Third time was the charm. I took home the check….and found we’d caught our injured stray kitty in the trap. Because of course, I needed one  more thing to do.

10:30: drive the kitty to the shelter

11:30 pick up preschooler from the school

12:00 get home and throw together lunch

12:20 get back in the car and drive to Taxville County Registry of Deeds to refinance the house

1:00 somehow find the correct attorney in a building whose ambiance can only be described as a delicate fusion of “bus terminal” and “early federal prison.” Keep the baby and the toddler occupied while we sign 890742734 documents, including a document stating that the attorney had explained the documents to us, and another document stating that the attorney had explained the document stating that he’d explained the documents to us.

1:30 get back in the car again and race home so I can arrive before my oldest gets back from school.

We’ll stop there because I’m getting a headache just remembering. 

We are, however, refinanced.

Unless they forgot to have us sign the form stating that we’d signed the form agreeing to sign forms that we needed to sign in order to request the other form.

Yeah. Something like that. Where’s my Advil…?