why Jesus wasn’t born nowadays

To: virgin.mary@ancientisrael.com
From: gabriel@janelebak.com
Date: March 25th, 9:35:55 AM
Subject: IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!
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Hello Mary, Full of Grace

I know this is kind of weird, but bear with me and don’t get worried. I’m Gabriel, one of the angels who stands directly before God, and I wanted to let you know that God’s really pleased with you.

You’re going to get pregnant and have a son, and you should name him Jesus. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, and he will reign over the house of Jacob forever.

Let me know if you have any questions.
Gabriel, Archangel

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To: gabriel@janelebak.com
From: virgin.mary@ancientisrael.com
Date: March 25th, 10:02:11 AM
Subject: re: IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!
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Dear Gabriel,

I was pleased to receive your email, but how can that be? I’m not married, and seriously, check out my email address.

Please say Hi to God from me and tell Him I love Him.

Sincerely,
Mary

PS: You might want to change your subject line if you do this again because my spam filter caught this the first time around.

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To: virgin.mary@ancientisrael.com
From: gabriel@janelebak.com
Date: March 25th, 10:15:29 AM
Subject: RE: re: IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!

Dear Mary:

The power of the Most High will overshadow you and the Holy Spirit will come upon you so the child to be born will be known as the son of God.

Oh, and I passed along your love to God, and He says He loves you too.

Thanks for letting me know about the spam filter thing, although I don’t anticipate doing this again.

May the Lord bless you and keep you always.
Gabriel, Archangel

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To: gabriel@janelebak.com
From: virgin.mary@ancientisrael.com
Date: March 25th, 11:24:30
Subject: re: RE: re: IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!

Dear Gabriel,

Okay, thanks. Tell God I’m cool with that.

Sincerely,
Mary